Remarkable Faith: Communion!

For the last eight weeks of Lent, I've been participating in Mary at Giving Up On Perfect's Remarkable Faith journey. Today is no exception! Our very last topic is communion. Enjoy!

As with all my stories, this one starts out with me as a strong-willed, independent, out-spoken, 8 going on 18, little girl.

My cousin Maggie was making her first communion, and there was a ceremony. I did not want to attend. My parents were obviously going to make me go, but getting me to go to church under any circumstance was a major challenge. I did the usual crying (the tears came at the drop of a hat at that age) and convinced my dad to incorporate something in it for me. I told him I would go and be good if I NEVER had to make my own first communion.

My dad agreed out of frustration. I was really such a hard child to deal with! So bull-headed and always too willing to fight it out so I could get what I wanted.

We went to Maggie's first communion, and I kept pressing the fact that I was going so I would never have to make my own. I was hesitant because I was afraid my dad would go back on his word and force me to make mine regardless.

On that day, we got to the communion late and ended up watching from the church entrance. We never even sat down. As soon as we walked out, I declared my freedom  in excitement. "I was good! Ha! Now I NEVER have to make my own first communion! I'M FREE!"

*********************

That was then. I was a bratty (couldn't you tell?), selfish, inconsiderate, scheming, manipulating 8 year old. I fully admit to that.

I couldn't see the significance of Maggie's first communion back then. In fact, I couldn't even see it when I was save 5 long years later at 13.

It has taken me until now to see the significance of that communion my life.

The funny thing is, I really never had a communion ceremony. I got away with a ton of stuff back then, and therefore missed out on a ton of stuff.

 I'm still selfish (aren't we all?) but I make a conscious effort not to be a brat as an adult. Just kidding! :)

I was so resistant of God for the first half of my life, and I always look back at this time in amazement of how much i didn't understand! I had no idea what the true meaning and purpose of communion was!

Some of the most significant moments in my lifetime have happened when I was at such a confused, resistant moment in life. Either right then, or sometime later, I always end up seeing how God really worked through me and did a miracle in my unwilling heart. I now appreciate communion, and understand why it's so special. I guess that's just the way He works!

Remarkable Faith: Prayer!

Yippee! This week I'm participating in Mary's Remarkable Faith series at Giving Up On Perfect. (This is the second to last week! Oh, no!) This week is on one of the best topics ever: prayer!

I love to pray. Seriously. I tell people I'm praying for them all the time, and I really do. I'm like a little prayer queen or something.

It makes me feel connected to God. And I know that He answers EVERY prayer we pray, whether that be with a yes or no. I'm still working on this one though: “And when you pray, do not heap up empty phrases as the Gentiles do, for they think that they will be heard for their many words." I hope He wasn't serious about that! No, my prayers are really long, but they aren't just empty words. I mean something.


Anyway, if I had to pick something/someone that I pray for the deepest, that's a piece of cake: Reece's Rainbow. For those of you who aren't regular readers here, Reece's Rainbow is the International Down Syndrome Orphan Ministry. I'm totally in love with all the children listed through Reece's Rainbow, just waiting to find their forever families.


I pray night and day, so hard for these little cuties. Let me tell ya, when you log on to check their page and you see the words, "My Family Found Me" written under their description, it's seriously as if you yourself are adopting them. It's the best feeling in the whole world!


If you want to see just a little bit of how crazy I get about these things, please please read these posts (in order!): 


NO WAY!


TRYING TO CONTAIN MY EXCITEMENT!


TAYLAH HAS A FAMILY!


Here's an excerpt in case you don't feel like it: 


Miracles Happen!


I'm so excited and thankful I can't even think. Max has a family!!!!!!!!!!
He was on my mind for a while, but I only just posted about him last Saturday! I it wasn't me that helped him though... I mean, no one even reads this blog! However, I was praying so hard for him. Anything is possible with the power of prayer.
I don't know any details, but I will try to find them out soon. All I know is that I logged onto Reece's Rainbow, looked up Max, and low and behold I saw that his family has found him. 
i am over the moon. I can't believe that this happened so quickly! I knew he would touch some wonderful parents hearts the way he touched mine... I had faith. 
I'm in awe at what the power God has. It really is miraculous.  
Of course, Max is still pretty far from home and his family will need all the financial help they can get. I'm praying that he will get some big donations. 
I had no idea what I would have to do to get Max a family, but I was willing. I had no resources, no real way to do anything. No power. But God had the power. 
I'll be advocating for Max until the day he gets home. There is no doubt about that. God is so good. Just when he knows you need it, He gives you a sign. 
"Therefore, stay awake, for you do not know on what day your Lord is coming." - Matthew 24:42
Apparently, I do know now. That day, was today.
Thank you, God!!!

So yes, I'm very passionate about the cause (to say the least). Well, in celebration of their 5 year Anniversary, Reece's Rainbow has a new 5/5/5 Warrior Project. They picked out every single 5 year old orphan in the system, with Down Syndrome or other Special Needs and make them eligible to have a 5/5/5 Warrior. 5/5/5 Warriors are supposed to help find their child a family, and also try to raise $5,000 by the end of the year.

I was shocked by the site of how many orphans has $0 in their grant funds. I found Nasira, and she tugged at my heart. What a sweetie! Nasira has CP (Cerebral Palsy) and she is 5 this June. 

I'm her warrior now. I will pray my heart out for her, and ask for God to grace this little girl with His presence! I'm honored to be praying for such an adorable girl, and I know God will hear what I have to say.He'll get her through this, but it's all up to Him.

So there you have it. I simply LOVE to pray, and especially for those that are in need (in my case, they are usually in need of Mommy's and Daddy's, but you know, I'll pray for anyone who needs it. Don't we all?)

"Pray without ceasing," - 1 Thessalonians 5:17


Blessings!

Remarkable Faith: Bible Study

Today, like every Thursday, I'm participating in Mary from Giving Up On Perfect's Remarkable Faith Series! This week, we are sharing about the Bible study that as had the biggest impact on our lives.



I gave my life to God when I was 13. I was so lucky that it happened at that time, because right around that age is when boy girl relationships start forming.

I never wanted that. I had this growing desire in my heart for purity. I didn't want to date, make-out, or any of those other things... I wanted more.
With that said, I hopped onto Amazon and ordered a copy of Before You Meet Prince Charming by Sarah Mally.

I had heard about the book before, but I wasn't sure what to expect. All I knew was, that I need something to guide me through the tough years ahead.

I read that book slowly. I savored every moment. It taught me so much about purity. I still read it and still use it as a resource. I have seen tremendous growth in my relationship with God since I was 13, and most if it can be credited to Sarah Mally.

Back then, I was so worried about staying pure. I had this irrational fear that a guy would come up and kiss me before I could stop him and I would be impure forever.

In the book, Sarah writes about her own experience with this boy who had a crush on her. He was chasing her around the playground, and finally got a hold of her to kiss her cheek. She says, "It wasn't pleasant, but at least it got him off my back. He never bothered me again."

Then I read her comparison of the 2 types of purity..The never been touched, bright white purity, and the once dirty but now clean,  washed purity. She explained that no matter what, we are all the washed kind. We have sinned, but we have been forgiven by His mighty grace!

This book gave me the courage not to fear boys. That's not what purity is about. Purity is about striving to do what is good, and what is godly, in His timing. It is vowing to live happily at the place in life you are currently at, and to wait until God decides it's time to  present you with your "Prince Charming".


Blessings!

Remarkable Faith: Worship!

Today, I am participating in Mary at Giving Up On Perfect's Remarkable Faith journey! Today, we are sharing about the most defining worship moments in our lives.

When I was 13, I had issues. I was so troubled, lost, and making wrong decisions every which way. My biggest wrong decision came in my choice to discriminate against my beloved cousin, Hannah, because of the brand of clothing she wore. Don't remind me!

That fight lasted for over a year, and then suddenly the feeling that I needed to end it, started creeping up. I couldn't shake it. The thing is, I had long since stopped hating Hannah. I never really even hated her in the first place! We are like sisters. It broke my heart to see us become enemies, but I was just so confused at that time that I didn't know what I wanted or how to achieve it.

I sent her an apology email. This is what it said:

Hannah,

    I just wanted to let you know that I don't hate you. I have been really immature and selfish but I'm sorry. I've grown up more now and I don't want to be in any kind of childish fight with you, whether or not we actually acted anything but nice to each other. I just wanted to say all of this so you would know but you think whatever you want of me. We are cousins and I'm so sorry I've acted so bratty. Truce?

and a whole, painstakingly long 24 hours later, she sent me this:

 I don't want to be in this fight either. I'm glad to know that you don't hate me and I want to let you know that I don't hate you either. I don't guess I have been very mature about any of this either and I'm sorry. I want us to be able to be friends and talk to each other like we used to. truce. 

Hannah

Right then and there, I thanked God. I knew that with the kind of sinner I had been, it must be a miracle for my amazing cousin to forgive me. Right then and there, my outlook on God went from zero to He is my hero!

It wasn't a fad either. It did not go away, Hannah and ?I stayed friends, and I continued to praise God in all situations, so thankful for His mercy and grace.

I took my little, light blue, mini New Testament and started reading. I was eager to soak up all that I could.

That was in late July.

I was so excited at  the sight of my relationship with Him growing.  I read my Bible some before bed each night.

One day, it was December 2nd. My 14th Birthday. It had seriously been the best birthday ever, and the first birthday I had ever felt truly happy on. It was a new experience for me, and a wonderful one. When I pulled out my Bible and opened it up, I began to read in Revelation. A few minutes later, I was looking at the FAQ section.

I did it. I read through the entire New Testament. My first attempt at soaking  up His mighty Words.

That was the best birthday present I've ever gotten.

So there you have it. That was the turning point of my life. That first experience, that accomplishment of finishing the Bible for the first time ever, after so much turmoil, is my most defining moment. I'm going to leave you off with this song, which was the first song I listened to once I found my faith. I instantly memorized the words, and I still sing it to calm me down when I'm panicking. Works like a charm. :)

Remarkable Faith: A Wedding!

Today, I'm participating in Mary from Giving Up On Perfect's Remarkable Faith journey! This week is actually funeral week, but if you will remember, I got that off my chest last week! Now, I get to share a much happier tale of marriage and faith. :)

You have to love weddings, right? Well, no. 

Let me explain. I guess you could call be a very opinionated child. I had my opinions, and I didn't hold back. Emotions on my shirt sleeve.  

Or, in other terms, I was obnoxious! I was very passionate about things and I always stood up for what I thought was right. Not so surprisingly, my right wasn't always right.

My dad has a huge family, (27 grandchildren, 62 great-grandchildren, all from 5 children!) so someone was always getting married. My mom always made a big deal about what we would wear, and I always went off on this huge tangent about how outfits don't matter, the bride and groom won't even remember what we wear, It's not like they will kick us out of the wedding if we are wearing an ugly skirt, etc.

So yes. Not a huge fan.

When I was almost 14, we went to my cousin Bethany's wedding. I did all the grumbling about it, put on a dress, and went. At least it wasn't in a church! (Back then I absolutely hated church, compared to now when I probably love it too much!) It was in a hotel.

We sat down on chairs in this "ball" room, which was way too small for all the people. Bethany is a little eccentric. Always has been! Today though, she looked gorgeous. So elegant in her one shoulder cream dress!

The ceremony wasn't long at all. But it's not the length that matters. It's the authenticity. And let me assure you, out of 15+ weddings in my life, this was the most authentic of all.

I mean, it was like someone had sprayed a bottle of love in there! I don't know how else to describe it. There love for each other was so obvious and real. You could tell it would last a lifetime {It has, so far! 5 years and counting.}.

The thing is, Bethany wasn't a bit religious. It wasn't a religious thing. It was a realization. 

During the entire ceremony, Bethany was laughing. That's her. She wasn't trying to be a formal, "model" bride. She was just trying to be Bethany. To add to the sweetness, Bethany and Andrew wrote their own vows!

And they both cried. Yes, even the guy cried. He barely got through the vows he was crying so hard. Before, I would have seen this as annoying and dramatic {I'm being truthful here!}, but for some reason, I didn't. I just saw it as possibly the sweetest thing ever!

Live. Laugh. Love.

You see, that wedding was perfect to me. Not because everything went flawlessly {Space was a big issue.}, but because it was so real. They were living in that moment, not acting.

So what have I learned from those 2 lovebirds? Well, maybe the little things aren't what matters. It's all in the big picture. Embrace it! So what if their aren't enough tables? Stand up! Dance! LIVE!

For me, I learned that I don't need to point out everyones flaws, and campaign so hard for my own ideas. Sometimes, it's just not necessary. Sometimes, everything just *magically* works out.

With LOVE!!!

Blessings!

Remarkable Faith: A Funeral Too Soon

Today, I am participating in Mary from Giving Up On Perfect's Remarkable Faith journey. Yay! Everyone else, however, is writing about a wedding. I will do a wedding next week, but today I had to be different. :) You'll see why!

Happy St. Patricks Day!

Are you wearing your green? I hope so. Usually, that's all St. Patricks Day is. It's just a fun day where you wear a green t-shirt and maybe eat some food dyed green.

For most people, when they think St. Patrick's day, their mind goes to green, four leaf clover, rainbow, pot of Gold, luck, etc. My mind thinks a fleeting thought about all of those things, and then I think of what St. Patrick's day REALLY means to me.

Brandon Times.

For grades kindergarten through sixth I went to Holy Spirit, in Fairfield, California. I loved that school so much! Sixth grade was the best, though.

In sixth grade we got reading buddies. First grade reading buddies. Me? I got Brandon Times.

Sweetest little guy you would have ever met. He could fill your heart with joy on the worst of days. On his own worst days. 

Brandon had  T-Cell Leukemia. A 6 year old. Leukemia.

It wasn't often that he was at school. He was usually absent, getting treatment done. On those pretty rare Monday's he did make it to school though, I was psyched. I loved reading with him!

We were a bunch of kids. 6 year olds, 11 year olds, we didn't know much about cancer. We knew Brandon was sick, and we prayed for him.

{Deep Breath.}

St Patricks Day 2004. I had on my favorite green shirt, we had just eaten dinner, and I was feeling happy. Why not?  The phone rang and I jumped to answer it.

YES! It was "private caller" a.k.a. my very best friend {to this day!} Sabrina.

That's when the world shattered.

I answered the phone only to hear the most startling, alarming, down right terrifying sound I've ever heard.

Sobbing. Hysterical sobbing. So bad I couldn't even understand my best friends words.

"What? Why are you crying?"

"SABRINA! I can't understand you!" Me in all my panicky glory.

"SABRINA!!!" I was worried for her.

"BRANDON DIED!" She managed to choke out between sobs.

I don't know how you react when you hear this kind of news, but it's the most terrifying thing in the world for me. My heart literally drops. I can't breathe for a moment. I can't catch up with reality. It's so horribly terrifying.

I didn't know what else to do. I screamed, "Brandon DIED!!!"

My parents came running. They grabbed the phone. I don't remember anything else.

We were eleven. We had just experience a death. My BEST FRIEND had just called me, hysterically sobbing, to tell me that my sweet little reading buddy, Brandon, had died.

At age 6.

I truly remember nothing else besides this moment with my dear best friend.

Except. that is, the moment  a few days later when all the solemn first and sixth graders lined up to take buses to the funeral home.

This is the most wrong kind of field trip I can think of.

We sat through the service, all 80 of us 1st and 6th graders {only his class and the reading buddy class got to come along.} The tears were streaming full force. They're streaming right now. :)

We certainly didn't understand it all. It was the first death for most of us. All we knew was that, while our tears were watering the grass here on Earth, Brandon was up laughing and playing, fully healed, in Heaven. 

In a better place.

And that is what allowed us young souls to get through the loss of our sweet little friend.

This funeral was by far the most impactful on my life.

For God to take a 6 year old, to cause his parents so much grief and heartbreak, there had to be a reason.

It's not fair. It's NOT! Still, 7 years later {Oh gosh, has it been that long?} I know we would all love to have him back.

I don't even know how many of us kids from the sixth grade class still remember. I could be the only one. But that's okay with me.

I don't think about Brandon everyday, but for about the last month I have been.

I'm a better person because of him.

Just a few days ago, I was reading my Bible and I came across Genesis 9:13:

 "I have set my bow in the cloud, and it shall be a sign of the covenant between me and the earth."

That's right. We are still connected. Brandon's up there in Heaven, on top of the clouds, at the peak of the rainbow, just out of reach.

"The rainbow appears when the clouds are most disposed to wet; when we have most reason to fear the rain prevailing, God shews this seal of the promise that it shall not prevail.
The rainbow appears when one part of the sky is clear, which imitates mercy remembered in the midst of wrath, and the clouds are hemmed as it were with the rainbow, that it may not overspread the heavens, for the bow is coloured rain, or the edges of a cloud gilded. As God looks upon the bow that he may remember the covenant, so should we, that we also may be ever mindful of the covenant with faith and thankfulness."

{Via Wesley's Explanatory Notes}

Be praying for Brandon's family today, if you would be so kind. His sweet Mom, Laura, has a memorial website for Brandon that you can check out to learn more about him.

For this child I prayed, and the Lord has granted me my petition that I made to him. Therefore I have lent him to the Lord. As long as he lives, he is lent to the Lord.” And he worshiped the Lord there. - 1 Samuel 1:27-28

Who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. - 2 Corinthians 1:4

Blessings!

P.S: Since everyone else is writing about weddings today, I figured I would share this. {To cheer you up!} 

Today marks the 21st anniversary of my very close friend Mary Elizabeth's parents! What a *lucky* day to be married on. :)

Here's to 21 more! Congrats Leslie and Mike Rumsey!

This just goes to show you: It's all a miracle. Life, death, resurrection, we have so much to be thankful for, even in times of sadness! :)

Remarkable Faith: Christmas Baptism

Instead of the usual Thoughtful Thursday, I'm spicing it up! For the next 8 weeks of Lent, I'm going to participate in Mary at Giving Up On Perfect's Remarkable Faith journey.

A Life-Changing Baptism
Nowadays, one of my favorite things is going to church. Seriously. It's crazy how much I enjoy church, especially with my history.

I haven't always liked church. In fact, I used to despise it. I cried when I had to go with my parents or grandparents. That really makes me sad today because I missed out on some awesome stuff.

Anyway, when I was 13 my cousin Hunter was born. His dad, my uncle Brian, was in the Navy. Normally, the church doesn't do baptisms in December because of all the business and excitement going on with Christmas, but because there were a few other military people in, they made an exception.

Needless to say, I DID NOT want to go. I cried, complained, whatever I could do to get myself out of going. Of course, my parents were never going to let me miss it, so I had to go. Plus, they were the Godparents.

"Ugh!!! I HATE church!!! Why?" I thought.

Luckily God would reveal this ever important WHY sooner than I'd ever expected. :)

I stormed into the church and promptly sat down with my head down and a fire burning in my heart. I'll show them. I won't watch, I won't listen. I HATE this!

The priest was asking all the families a few questions and then proceeded on with the ceremony. My little 2-month old cousin, Hunter, was up first.

Hunter's parents, my own parents, and the priest were all standing to together. My mom was holding Hunter, and as she passed him so that the official splash of water could be done, it hit me.

He's the one who did this.

He's the One who made it all happen.

It was Him.

You simply can't deny the miracle of life.

He is our father or fathers, our bane of existence, the one who keeps us going with each breath we take.

Hunter's parents and my parents were standing up there, but there was also another parent looking over us.

It was one of those moments... you know, where your parents are actually right about something, but you could never let them know that!

I pretended it was horrible and all, but it really wasn't. I've liked church ever since. It was a memorable step for me in my faith journey.The first step is always the hardest, right?

As I write all of this down, I figure out that there was a lot more to it than I thought. We don't get saved in just one day. It's a longer journey than that. Mine all happened when I was 13. I never really saw any of these things (especially this Baptism) as remarkable or life-changing, but they were.

And do you know when all of this happened? Only the day after our savior's birth (2,000+ years later) on December 26th.

"Who saved us and called us to a holy calling, not because of our works but because of his own purpose and grace, which he gave us in Christ Jesus before the ages began,"- 2 Timothy 1:9

Blessings!